MARV Review

Train Dreams: A surprisingly dull slog through beige. Seriously, did they even *attempt* to inject any color into this cinematic beige? The logger, bless his heart, spends the whole time looking mournful while a truck driver in a powdered wig does the talking. It’s like watching a beige-themed funeral. The plot? It’s a meandering path through a field of disappointment, punctuated by a soundtrack of mournful banjo music. The audience, I suspect, is just desperately hoping for a conveniently timed rain shower. Don't even get me started on the symbolism – a train? Really? It’s a train to a profoundly depressing destination. I’d rather watch paint dry.